RHOM’s Marysol Patton Shares Her Guide to the Perfect Cocktail

“Everyone wants their cocktail,” says Marysol Patton of The Real Housewives of Miami, the beloved Housewives franchise that first premiered on Bravo in 2011 and was rebooted on Peacock in 2021, when Andy Cohen decided it was time to bring back the heat. Fans clamored for the return of Patton, the glamorous, wealthy, and proud Cuban marketing maven known for her high-end style and penchant for a stiff cocktail, or “cockies,” as she calls them in the zany and quick-witted confessionals that established her as a standout, even among one of the most entertaining and explosive casts in the Housewives multiverse. Frequently, the ladies slip into speaking Spanish on camera, which has gained the show a foothold in its growing Latino fan-base. “It’s so familiar to them and it makes them happy,” Patton tells me when I bring up the infusion of Spanglish into the Housewives universe. 

Now, Patton can be seen on another Housewives property: The Real Housewives Ultimate Girls Trip (streaming on Peacock), where she and her RHOM bestie Alexia Nepola are joined by heavyweights from other franchises like Porsha Williams, Leah McSweeney, and Candiace Dillard Bassett (the latter is a personal favorite of Patton’s, she divulged). Both her castmates and the Greek chorus on the internet have expressed concern about Patton’s love of cockies, but she’s not losing any sleep. It’s all part of her Housewives gameplay, she explains; everyone is hooked on something. “If they don’t drink, they’re smoking something, or taking a pill,” she said. Or perhaps that was her iconic late mother Elsa, a fan-favorite from RHOM’s initial Bravo run. “Las locuras que me salen de la boca son de ella,” Patton explains, carrying on Elsa’s legacy. So, in the spirit of self-care, we asked the cockie queen to recommend the perfect libation for a series of semi-random occasions, from a girl’s night out to watching yourself on television. “Don’t get fucked up,” she warns, or “you’ll miss all the points everyone’s trying to make.”

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WATCHING YOURSELF ON TELEVISION

“When I watch mine, I wait for my husband to get home, and they’re a little too stiff. So don’t have a stiff one, because you really need to pay attention to what everybody’s saying. So maybe have a glass of rosé. Don’t get fucked up. Because then you’ll miss all the points everyone’s trying to make.”

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CLASSIC COCKIE

“I really enjoy the sugar, it’s not so much the alcohol. I have a big sweet tooth, and instead of eating cookies, I just drink fresh juices my husband brings me from Whole Foods. Oh my god, I love all of them. And then sometimes I put a little vodka in them, sometimes I don’t. But I love sugar, so anything sweet.”

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DINNER WITH THE GIRLS

“I usually get an extra spicy margarita, and then I get an extra shot of tequila on the side, and then I just keep pouring it in, so the drink lasts me a long time. No ice, because it waters it down. I get the ice out, and you just keep tipping in the tequila. And then you have a stiff one.”

 

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PARA BAILAR

“You can’t dance with a cocktail. You spill it everywhere, so you’ll need one of my cockie cups para que no lo tires por todos lados. I’m known as a spiller, so I would not recommend drinking on the dance floor.”

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SEEING YOUR EX’S NEW BOO

“Well, that’s never happened to me, but I would probably just go home and have my own personal freak out.”

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GETTING LAID

“Oh god, my husband’s going to kill me. Listen, some people are born sluts, and they don’t need any liquid courage, they just can go right in there. But if you don’t have a lot of courage in you, [have] a little fresh shot of tequila, just to get that liquid courage, if you need it. If you don’t, just go right in there, no cockie necessary. Get in there con tu cara de puta! [Laughs]”

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HAPPY HOUR

“Oh, well my husband loves wine, so we always have a big bucket of wines and champagnes out. Don Julio Blanco with pink lemonade is great. That’s what I was trying to say in the Watch What Happens Live, when they kept going, bleep bleep bleep. It’s very good with Simply Pink Lemonade. You just throw a couple raspberries in there. Es riquisimo! My mother had a coffee line, Havana Elsa coffee, and so I’ll make espresso martinis too.”