Caitlin Reilly Wants You to Unfollow All Your Exes

By now, most of us have encountered the “girl who is going to be okay.” Ubiquitous on our newsfeeds, cringey, repellent, and instantly familiar, she is one of Caitlin Reilly’s many internet characters who we love to hate. The actress and comedian has gifted us with her uncanny impersonations of all kinds of exhausting people, including the recurring ‘wasp mom’ and a really British Gillian Anderson selling you an unnecessary wellness soda called “G spot.” Reilly’s been busy offline too, recently starring in Darren Aronofsky’s  film Little Death alongside Dominic Fike and Talia Ryder and voicing the character Fabian in In The Know, a stop-motion animated comedy that parodies a fictional NPR host. “Fabian is basically a representation of the comment section of the internet,” she told me over DM last week, “and reminded me of a lot of crazy DM’s I’ve received from recreationally offended people over the years.” For this week’s Search History, we slid into Reilly’s DM’s to talk about getting cancelled by cat owners and that time she “butt dialed” her ex.

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EMILY SANDSTROM: A/S/L?

CAITLIN REILLY: 34/F/Los Angeles. Wow, it’s 2003 again I love it. 

SANDSTROM: What’s the first thing you do when you wake up?

REILLY: Doom scroll, which is VERY bad. I’m trying to break the habit.

SANDSTROM: Your video of celebrities apologizing really makes me laugh. What’s your cancellable offense that you would have to make an apology video for? 

REILLY: Thank you! Well, I recently was soft canceled on Instagram because I said that cats were out for 2024. The cat community HATED that.

SANDSTROM: What’s in? 

REILLY: Honestly? Being a little more mean probably. Sick of being nice to meanies.

SANDSTROM: Making notes! 

REILLY: We’re mean and thriving in 2024!

SANDSTROM: What were your last three google searches?

REILLY: Omg, here we go. I have a little bit of fashion, Tracee Ellis Ross, and then me just googling pictures of Jessica Chastain and Michael Shannon. At 12:44am mind you. 

SANDSTROM: Jessica Chastain and Michael Shannon are the dream duo. 

REILLY: They really are. Been a Stan since Take Shelter.

SANDSTROM: Did you freak out the first time you went viral?

REILLY: I did! I had a panic attack because I felt like my boss at the time would find out and I would be fired.

SANDSTROM: What was your job at the time?

REILLY: I was a personal assistant for a woman who was a real estate agent and absolutely did not need a personal assistant. So my job consisted of moving things around in her apartment while she was at yoga.

SANDSTROM: What does your Tiktok FYP look like right now?

REILLY: Unfortunately, I accidentally watched an “energy cleansing” video that popped up on my feed because I was in the other room, so now my entire FYP is that. But when I’m checked in, it’s mostly foodtok.

SANDSTROM: Does your character Fabian from In The Know remind you of anyone you’ve done a bit on?

REILLY: Absolutely. Fabian is basically a representation of the “comment section” of the internet, and reminded me of a lot of crazy DM’s I’ve received from recreationally offended people over the years.

SANDSTROM: What’s the worst DM you’ve received?

REILLY: Oh, wow. I would have to say the copious amounts of times a random man has called me a young hot version of Hillary Clinton and then asked for pics of my asshole. ✨

SANDSTROM: Oh my god.

REILLY: Romance isn’t dead.

SANDSTROM: Well I hate to ask, but do you see any resemblance? 

REILLY: I mean, I kinda do and I don’t know how to feel about that.

SANDSTROM: Can you send a fit pic?

REILLY: Right now? Well you’re gonna die because I’m wearing a jumpsuit.

SANDSTROM: Love this. Should I get Uggs?

REILLY: They’re clutch and will always be a part of the capsule wardrobe. According to Pinterest. 

SANDSTROM: What was your most recent online purchase? 

REILLY: Levi jeans at 2am. 

SANDSTROM: Which character of yours would you spin off into a TV show? 

REILLY: Probably “wasp mom.” Cheryl Johnson needs a thorough storyline and redemption arc.

SANDSTROM: Money or clout?

REILLY: Why not both.

SANDSTROM: Can you spill the beans on working alongside David Schwimmer in Darren Aronofsky’s new movie?

REILLY: Oooooooooof, yes. Truly, and I’m not just saying this, the kindest man I have ever met in a professional way. He was SO collaborative and giving and kind, and really made me feel like his equal in our scene. He truly is such a lovely person.

SANDSTROM: Can you describe your most incriminating accidental email/text?

REILLY: Hmmm let me see. I was once going through a bad breakup. My ex came to my house to have the final “break up talk.” I was trying desperately to save the relationship, but he was done. As he was leaving and I was in tears, I panicked and called him twice, back to back. Then realized how unhinged that looked. So I texted him and said “sorry, butt dial.” That was the last time we talked in person I think. He naturally never responded to the call or text.

SANDSTROM: On that note, can you share your best break up advice?

REILLY: Yes. Delete. Block. No contact. IMMEDIATELY. No reason to follow your exes online. I wish I could unfollow all of mine, but too much time has passed and it would be unceremoniously rude at this point. 

SANDSTROM: What is your stalking platform of choice?

REILLY: Ooooooh can I be honest? I could be a professional online stalker if acting fails. I have an account on a website called “truthfinder.com” And I can find out……anything and often do. I made the account to help a friend deal with a family issue. But then I was like “hmm…..there is something here.” And now I stalk sometimes when I’m bored. Mostly my friend’s boyfriends or people in high school who wronged me.

SANDSTROM: Regarding the girl who is “going to be ok,” can you let us know if we are actually going to be ok?

REILLY: Well, it’s an election year. So if we get out and vote our little asses off, then it will ❤️❤️❤️